catholic wedding?

My first official “rant” about wedding planning (feel free to skip — involves talk about the Catholic church and my Dad)…

Before Rob and I went to Southern CA to visit possible wedding sites, we decided that we would not have a Catholic ceremony. To be quite honest, we’re not practicing Catholics and it didn’t really feel like “us” to have a church ceremony. I knew my Dad would have some “concerns” about this (to put it lightly) so I told him right away. He said he understood and it was our decision. I SWEAR that’s what he said. But then just recently, my Dad backtracks and decides to tell me that we have to get married in the church. And this is after he knows that we spent 2 long days looking at sites where we could have both the ceremony and reception in one place.

AAAARRRRRGGGHHHH. I wish he had been straight with me initially so I wouldn’t feel like I just wasted a whole lot of time and effort visiting sites that might not make sense now (some of them just wouldn’t have the same impact if they were used for a reception only).

But that’s fine. Rob and I talked it over and decide that we would respect his wishes, even if we don’t necessarily *want* to get married in the church. (Plus, he’s helping us pay for the wedding and that in itself, gives him a voice, whether I like it or not). It’s not a good reason to do it (and quite frankly, I’m embarassed by it) but arguing with my Dad is like hitting my head against a brick wall. Painful and absolutely useless.

So I start doing a little research online to see what I have to do. I have to find a church that will allow us to get married there even though we’re not registered parishioners. Seems easy enough. I’ll send a donation. And I’m sure someone will take pity on me since I live in Northern CA and want to have my wedding close to my family and friends. But here comes the rub… I have to find a priest who will still marry us even though we live together (a huge no no, apparently), we don’t go to Mass on Sundays, and Rob hasn’t received the sacrament of Confirmation (typically required for a Catholic marriage). Why does it have to be so difficult?
I guess it’s not really difficult. I’m just grumpy because the whole planning process hasn’t been going the way I would like.

Or maybe it’s just PMS. :/ Which is entirely possible.